Twenty one seems an awful lot different from what my ten year old self thought it would be. Naturally, I thought I would have my life wrapped in a pretty neat little package. I would be secure in who I was, and what I was doing.
I have to say adulthood doesn’t always feel like that. Then again, this is my first time doing this whole adult thing, so i’m not quite sure what its supposed to feel like. There are a million buzzfeed posts that talk about the trials and tribulations of entering into adulthood, and some of them capture it well. Adulthood encompasses a myriad of things, including: being more responsible about life decisions and fiscal decisions. Choices abound about possibly more schooling and jobs and… everything really. For me it was all the little choices that made it what it was, what type of transportation do I want? What about internet, and rent, and everything else that is included in flying far away from the nest? There is something freeing, and stressful about that. Another part of adulthood is realizing that you can no longer run from things (which you really shouldn’t anyways). In school if you didn’t appreciate someone’s company you could move to a different seat. Well you can’t move desks anymore kid, you have to face that in this world there a million different personalities.
My dad and I talked the other day about personality traits, and how I found some harder to handle than others. He told me that you can’t look at certain ones as right, and certain ones as wrong (besides things that are obvious character flaws, and people should work on to change) but that they are all important. You need big thinkers, and you need detailed people. You need people who are laid back, and people who push things. You need listeners, and good communicators. You need problem solvers, logical thinkers, happy-go-lucky’s, and creative doers. Even at a recent meeting with co-workers we talked about the different “colors” people are. Those colors signal different personality traits. Each of us for the most part were different colors, and we realized we needed each and every one of us.
I think for too long I was looking at what I thought they lacked, because I was a certain way, I would get frustrated that they were not. I still think that I will never understand how to handle certain characteristics, and surely there are people who feel that way about some characteristics I possess. However, this whole not moving desks and embracing adulthood has shown me that I need to embrace people exactly as they are. I love that about people, what makes them the person they are. Sometimes however that is the very reason I get frustrated. I forget that every single person is valuable, and has a story. Every single person is more than just certain characteristics, they are a person who deserves love, grace, and encouragement. We all deserve to feel appreciated, it doesn’t matter if it is by someone just like us, or completely different.
Overall, my entrance into adulthood has been sloppy, and I have been impatient, but I know God is helping me learn ALOT. I sure have learned a lot about myself, and he has opened my eyes to much of the world, and so much more that I need to learn.
As I continue to navigate through all of this, I realize I am currently a master of not a lot of trades, I am confused about my future, and just want to be happy and spread happiness. Even though there are many things I am not, there are more things that I am and I am confident in what God has placed in my heart. Cheers to all the things that each of you are, and all the places you are going. After all, there is only forward in life, no other way.
Peace from Cambo